


I Wish You Could See My Wings

by ElizaStyx



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angel Wings, Blind Dean, Castiel's True Form, Disability, Hurt/Comfort, I am so fucking sorry, M/M, Sad, Sad Fluff, Tattoos, Touching, Wings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-11
Updated: 2014-09-11
Packaged: 2018-02-16 22:48:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2287277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElizaStyx/pseuds/ElizaStyx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean Winchester thought he was ready to see Castiel's true form, he thought that his love made him special enough...</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Wish You Could See My Wings

Castiel was crying silently, holding his beloved in his arms, caressing his beautiful, beautiful face. The blood was drying in the cold air and the angel could feel it stretch the skin on his fingers but he didn't care.

He only wished he could turn back the time and say no.

He had to force himself to look at Dean, to look at the two black holes that once held the greenest eyes he had ever seen. He should have known that this would happen but he never wanted anyone more than Dean to see his true form, see his glorious wings and his real face.   
The price was too high though and it was the person dearest to him who paid it in the end.

Dean Winchester was blind.

It still hadn't fully occured to him as he was holding onto Cas and breathing shallowly, mortified by the pain and the darkness that suddenly surrounded him.  
Castiel couldn't say a word. He couldn't break the silence as if it would make this more real, more true.  
Even more painful.

"Cas..." Dean's voice was a whisper. "Cas..." a smile appeared on his face. "You are so beautiful..."

Castiel felt his heart breaking in two.

***

The first months were hard. Dean had to learn how to do all the basic things by himself, having only the hearing and the touch as a guide. He had to learn how to live again and Castiel was obviously always there for him to help.

The angel went silent as the guilt devoured him. Dean was dealing with it better than he did, simply choosing to move on and find as much of a joy of life as he could and Castiel admired and envied him, unable to see the bright side of life any more.  
Castiel had never asked him how he was doing that.  
Dean couldn't see the sadness on his angel's face but he could feel it. He felt it in the way Castiel's muscles clenched around him desperately when they made love, in the way Castiel's kisses were now different, submissive, in the way Castiel's hugs were so terribly possessive and full of a hidden plea.  
He felt that it wasn't becoming easier with every passing day for the angel like it did for him.

Castiel was not coping.

Finally it became too much for Dean to stand. One day he just forced the angel to sit down and listen to him.  
"Cas..." he said and instantly knew that the angel shivered, hearing his voice. "I need to tell you something. Are you listening?"  
"I am, Dean." Castiel's voice was husky as if he had just stopped crying.  
"Good." Dean nodded his head and leaned forward on his newly bought cane. "I want you to know that even if I were sure that this would happen to me, I would do it. Hell, I would do it again, if I magically got my eyes back."  
Castiel stared at him with shock. "Why, Dean? Why would you do that?"  
"Because I saw heaven, Cas." Dean smiled. "I saw you and this was the most perfect experience in my life. I saw the light, the endless beauty and the pure essence of your soul. I saw your wings. It was worth everything, Cas."

Castiel hid his face in his palms and sobbed bitterly. He didn't even notice the exact moment when Dean stood up and embraced him, rocking him in his arms, kissing the crown of his head.  
"I..." Castiel was choking on his tears. "I wish you could see me like that and not get hurt. I was so stupid, selfishly wanting you to see my wings, to tell me that you love them, to tell me that you love the real me..."  
"Of course I love the real you, you dumbass..." Dean chuckled, nuzzling into Castiel's hair. "And maybe there still is a way for me to see them."  
Castiel raised his head to look at him with his big blue eyes. "Is there?"  
Dean didn't answer. He just smiled mischievously, kissing Castiel softly on the trembling lips.

***

Dean slowly unbuttoned Castiel's shirt and let it fall onto the ground, while he caressed the bare chest of his angel with his still learning fingers. The skin was warm and smooth under his touch and he couldn't help planting a few kisses on it before he moved on to the main reason he had Castiel undressed for.  
He put his hands on the angel's shoulders, feeling him shiver nervously, and then he delicately pushed to make him turn around.

His hands wandered along Castiel's collarbone and then down his back, up to the first thick line.

Castiel strained all his muscles and huffed silently when his lover's fingers traced the curves of the pattern. They went down to his hipbones and back to the shoulder blades, patient in their journey.  
There was no noise in the room apart from the sound of their breaths.  
Dean's face was tense as he was lost in his wander, feeling the convexities painting the picture for him. Painting the wings on Castiel's back.

He could see them.  
He could see them with his hands.

Dean Winchester smiled.


End file.
